Table of Influence: What Successful People Know and You Should Too

Reality is, you don’t have it all together. Formal education is not enough. You have questions you can’t answer. This is why we must be willing to invite people to our table of influence. The table is where we invest in others, learn from others, and develop new solutions to today’s problems. For the last nineteen years, God has used leaders and mentors on all levels to make me into the man that I am today.

John Maxwell says, “Leadership is influence.” If this is true—and I believe it is—we must think deeply about the types of leaders we surround ourselves with. The people at our table make us into the leaders we are becoming. Aristotle brilliantly wrote, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act but a habit.” Here’s some advice for choosing your table mates so excellence becomes one of your habits.

1. Pick the Right Mix of People
The right mix of personalities will make or break the success of your table. I’ve read several lists that identify the different roles people play in our lives. You want a variety of personalities that fill all the roles. Consider saving seats for people with these traits:

• Clarifier: Asks helpful and difficult questions.
• Specialist: Provides precision focus, moving you toward the intended target.
• Challenger: Implores you to act boldly.
• Creator: Brings an idea into existence by crafting workable action plans from just a few actionable points.
• Connector: Leads you to other people.
• Wise Elder: Lends experience and perspective.
• Friend: Shares life’s journey without judgment and loves you.
• Strategist: Creates step-by-step simplicity from complex data and conversations.
• Dreamer: Motivates you to dream without fear.
• Coach: Builds on your strengths, corrects poor performance, and encourages when energy fades.
• Pastor: Provides spiritual guidance.

2. Assess Their Leadership Acumen

There is a difference between holding a position of leadership and being a leader. Choose people for your table who exhibit specific leadership characteristics that you need most. You want:

Leaders who are interested in your well-being. Some leaders are self-centered and only look for personal benefits. Find someone who is others’ focused. Marcus Buckingham suggests choosing people who know you, care about you, and want you to prevail and win.

Leaders who are trustworthy. Trust is crucial. Jalen Rose says creating a personal board is all about win-win. You must give as much as you receive; trust is core to this give-and-take.

Leaders who have an area of expertise. Ken Blanchard attests that none of us is as smart as all of us—we need others’ resources to do our best. Find people with a storehouse of knowledge.

Leaders who ask hard questions. Such people will push you to think and act toward the growth you want—but avoid because it’s uncomfortable.

Leaders who keep you on track toward your goals. Look at their track records—do they have a history of consistent success? They can only take you as far as they have gone themselves. Craig Groeschel suggests that the people closest to us will often determine our destiny. Choose your table wisely.

Leaders who may not be as popular or recognizable. The best leaders might be unknown people. They can make a great contribution if given the chance.

Leaders who help you cross from the unknown to the known. Experienced leaders have a perspective that moves you into unknown territory to claim rewards you don’t even know of yet.

Leaders who provide accountability. These leaders provide feedback at critical points. Jim Collins says that a personal board helps you find creative alternatives to life’s challenges and is a terrific place to turn for advice on handling crises and ethical dilemmas.

Leaders who help you grow into exceptional standards of character. These are people you look up to, whose integrity shines. Character development is more personal than professional, but Bill George says a personal board of directors is formed to help an individual with “professional issues.”

Leaders who are willing to help you seasonally. Keep in mind the people who can come alongside even for just a season.

Ralph Waldo Emerson writes, “Our best thoughts come from others.” With the rich investment I’ve had from these thirteen folks—and too many others to name—I know my best thoughts are inspired by them.

I trust these tips will help you develop your own table of influence. And when you have opportunity to sit at someone else’s table of influence, do so with a great sense of reverence and gratitude. Nothing underlines that attitude more than the role the table of influence has played in our own lives—and the lives of the successful people we admire and aspire to become. We are being made into better leaders so that we can help make the next generation better leaders. Here’s to taking our place at the table.

Is there anyone else you invite to your table of influence? Tell us in the comments below.